The first time I did a 4th step (in AA) I hated everything about it. Just the mere act of writing down the names of the people in my life was painful. I didn’t even have to write anything else to feel bad.
I didn’t feel like I was doing it “right”. Using the example in the Big Book seemed awkward. I decided it was out-of-date and, therefore, wasn’t relevant. That meant I needed to find a better, more modern (i.e., easier, softer) way of doing it. More